If you’re reading this, thanks already.

If you have been following along on the Authentically Ashlyn blog, you know that I have been expressing my writing in the form of poetry for a few years now. Today, I am going to share a poem from my very first published book To All The Moms That Came Before Me.

This poem is very near and dear to my heart and I believe that many moms in the thick of postpartum can relate to the exhaustion, desperation and helplessness felt on those extra hard days of motherhood.

To all my fellow Mamas: I hope you read this poem and know you aren’t alone.

To the Mom Who Had a Hard Day

I heard my baby should be cluster feeding,

but all she does is cluster cry,⁣

I’ve paced the house for 6 hours now, ⁣

still unsure as to why.⁣

⁣

My baby is supposed to sleep,

it says it right here on this app, ⁣

but she has her own schedule now,

and her mom just needs a nap. ⁣

⁣

I guess this is what they call a meltdown,

I knew it would come one day,⁣

when my baby was too young to communicate,

learn, run or play.

⁣

I look at her crying to me,

for all reasons still unknown, ⁣

I pace by the window to look for her dad,

so I can finally have time alone. ⁣

⁣

How can you love something so much,

while it simultaneously pulls you apart? ⁣

How can something so precious to me-

continue to break my heart?⁣

⁣

I am a good mom, right?

I just really need a break.

It’s 3AM and we’re up again –

please God, I don’t want to be awake.⁣

⁣

I shush and feed

and maybe cry a little too, ⁣

and remind myself –

for both of us – this is still so new.

So this is a poem I wrote,

through the fussing, the cries and the screams,⁣

To remind all moms – you’re doing GREAT,

even when you’ve met your extremes. ⁣

It’s OK to have those days mama,

the ones where you’re boiling over,⁣

‘cause one day you’ll just blink,

and your baby will be growing older. ⁣

⁣

So if your days are filled with nothing else,

but keeping your baby living-

then you’re doing it all right mom,

this is a family you’re building.

If you enjoyed this glimpse of my book or know a friend who would, please check out my postpartum poetry book: To All The Moms That Came Before Me